Paying it forward and the kindness of strangers 

I’m writing this just as I’ve got home from the supermarket. I must admit supermarket shopping is not my favourite task of the week, especially when I have both children with me. They often fight with each other, scream for food and try to climb out of the trolley (Aldi, why don’t you have seatbelts on the babyseats?!) But today I left the supermarket feeling pretty positive.

I always try and get round the supermarket as quick as possible, I make a concise list in the order that I find the items in the supermarket and rarely deviate from this, but today as I grabbed some bread off the shelf I found an older lady struggling to pull a loaf of bread out of the crate. She’d been there a little while I think, just tugging on it but because the crates were stacked on top of each other quite high she couldn’t pull it out. I was about to walk off when I noticed her, so I just said, “Do you need a hand?” and all I had to do was lift up the crate on top so she could pull the loaf out. No big deal. She got her bread and I got on with my shop.

I only had Elodie with me this time so it wasn’t so bad but she just won’t stay sitting down, she stands up in the seat and tries to climb out, on the lookout for food and excitement. It’s always a struggling getting through the tills with her at Aldi because they do it so quickly and then I have to pack the bags while she’s hanging perilously close to the edge of the trolley. But as I was packing the bags, a couple came over and talked to Elodie and the lady watched over her so I was able to pack my bags quickly and she made sure Elodie didn’t hurt herself. It wasn’t really a hardship for them, they maybe took them an extra minute or two to leave the shop but they got to coo over a cute baby and it really helped me out and I left the supermarket really positive and grateful for their help. So many times I’ve been struggling way more than I was today and thought, “Does nobody notice? Can nobody help?” So it was nice that somebody did notice there was a need and took some extra time to help me out.

I do try to ‘pay it forward’ when I can. I’m having a clearout at the moment as we’re moving house soon (more on that later) and posted a picture of a bunch of baby toys and a wooden walker on a local Facebook, free to collect. I got most of them for free either second hand or as a gift so I’m just grateful to have less to pack and if it helps somebody then that’s great, but I had some responses that really annoyed me. “Do they all work?” “There’s a scuff on the side.” …..Erm….they’re free. I’m pretty sure they do work…but if they don’t? Guess what….they were free. Have you heard of batteries? And yes, they’re second hand and have been used… if you want something in pristine condition go pay full price for it! I gave them to somebody who was very pleased to get them and picked up right away and I’m glad another baby will get some use out of the toys.

I wish more people would take time to be a bit more thoughtful and help people around them – I’m such a moody bitch and rarely think about anyone but myself so I really want to try harder with it – let’s call this a fresh start. I also wish more people would be grateful for the kindness of others and pass on that kindness!

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My advice to a CHD family

Being told your child has a heart defect and needs surgery is probably one of the worst things you will ever hear. Nothing can prepare you for it, especially when all the doctors and nurses have been saying, “I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about.”

It’s been over 3 years since we found out about Bo’s defect and coming up 2 years since his operation so I thought I would share some things I’ve learnt.

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Trying to feel like ‘me’ again after having kids

So I haven’t blogged in absolutely ages. I feel like I haven’t got the time but in reality I’m a stay at home mum with a baby who sleeps all the time so I probably could find the time if I tried not particularly hard.

But really I’ve just been having a weird time recently, personally. I don’t really know why but I think I’ve been having some sort of quarter life crisis and still trying to figure out what I’m doing to do with my life since I haven’t got a job for September, which was what my original plan was.

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